I can see the appeal in this song and I appreciate the actual craftmanship in many ways like the lo-fi intro, some melodic turns and Rivers vocals.

It’s just when it all comes down to it, this song does nothing for me. I feel nothing when I listen to it and it bores me to the point that I just have to skip it.

Possible explanations:

1.) Much like offscreen movie violence is more disturbing than graphic onscreen violence, perhaps hearing the horrible descriptions had me expecting a Chernobyl instead of merely a Three Mile Island.

2.) After WAAOD / WAAIL, EGD, CSP (Crunky version), etc etc I’ve just been properly inoculated against weirdo embarrassing Cuomo songs.

3.) Yes, it’s full of awful ideas, but atleast this way the awful ideas are consolidated into ONE song, instead of distributed throughout like Red. It really takes one for the team.

Perhaps. But then, it’s also unbelievably catchy. And for once, a dumb Weezer song went properly over-the-top-they’re-clearly-NOT-serious, instead of the half-ass-are-they-joking? style that made “In the Mall” and the aforementioned songs so uncomfortable.

“I’m sure Adam’s contributed something to this, too – simply combining two songs together is producer work, not songwriter work. It may largely Cuomo’s work, but I’m sure something was put in to give Adam’s the co-writing credit.

Not trying to pick apart what you’ve written, just not sure on the first point and expanding a bit upon the 2nd point.”

Hey, I agree with you. Like I said in the post, I really doubt his contribution begins and ends there; I’m sure he contributes some lines and the like. Also, Rivers said the finished product came out of a ~half hour jam session, right? So that right there implies a good amount of collaboration.

I’m sure Adam’s contributed something to this, too – simply combining two songs together is producer work, not songwriter work. It may largely Cuomo’s work, but I’m sure something was put in to give Adam’s the co-writing credit.

Not trying to pick apart what you’ve written, just not sure on the first point and expanding a bit upon the 2nd point.

Regardless, a really enjoyable song.

Regarding Green, fellas, I never said that its mediocrity is the reason it’s great. I’m saying that its nigh-mechanical concision and focus, while holding the record back from the Blue-worthy pop classic it could’ve been (to wit: 2002 version of “O Girlfriend,” 2005 version of “Don’t Let Go”), provides it a level of consistency that allows it to truly be a Very Good (But Not Great) Album. No other =W= record from the past decade comes close, except maybe Hurley — we shall hear…

But I don’t think there’s anything “mediocre” about Green at all. So many great melodies, harmonies, even lyrics. There are a few highs, not a single low, and a slew of great middle-ground tracks. It’s also the easiest =W= album to listen to, and that’s not a bad kind of record to have in your discography.